|A Whole New Kind of Bitch|
|Season One, Episode Five|
|Air date||October 11, 2011|
|Written by||Shintaro Shimosawa|
|Directed by||Janice Cooke|
|Title quote by||Juliet Martin|
It's Gonna Kill Me, But I'll Do It
The Poor Kids Do It Everyday
Shivette, Henry, and Andrew are in a car together. Shivette tries to call Gemma, but is sent to voicemail. Henry keeps asking Shivette about what happened to Gemma and if she said anything to her, in which she insists that she didn't. There's a flashback of Gemma and Bridget's encounter when she admits to her that she's Bridget. Gemma, however, doesn't believe her and walks away.
Shivette and Andrew come home to a vandalized portrait of Siobhan, a mess, and loud music. Andrew tells Juliet that she's acting out and she should apologize to Siobhan, but she still doesn't. Bridget tries calling Gemma again, but she is still sent to voicemail. She leaves her a message saying they needed to talk.
Henry comes home and finds Gemma on the couch. He tells her that everyone was worried, but she replies saying that she doubts it. Gemma is looking at an old video from New Year's party and finds a scar on Siobhan's wrist. She then leaves, ignoring Henry.
Shivette tells Andrew that she's going to Gemma's office and sees that he is cleaning up the mess Juliet left. Andrew tells her that he saw Shivette comforting Juliet when she was sick. Then he says that he doesn't know what made her act out again and Shivette suspects that she's hiding drugs. She, then, starts rummaging around Juliet's room. Andrew, surprised, asks her to let him handle Juliet.
Gemma confronts Bridget and asks her to let her see her arm. She finds that it has no scar and tells Bridget that Siobhan burnt herself in a cooking class. Bridget asks to talk somewhere else.
Juliet is talking on her phone when she walks into her room, finding that it's been searched. She knew that her dad would never do it and suspects that Siobhan did. She decides to trash Siobhan's stuff including her wedding dress and pours perfume on her shoes. She pulls out purses and finds Bridget's NA pamphlet.
Bridget and Gemma are talking at a cafe. Gemma is still surprised about Siobhan's apparent suicide. She is also confused about Bridget's motivation for taking Siobhan's identity. When Bridget asks for Gemma to keep the secret to herself, Gemma refuses, saying that she doesn't know Bridget.
Bridget goes to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting and talks about what has happened in her life so far. She meets Charlie, but doesn't reveal her name, pointing out that the meetings were supposed to be anonymous. Charlie gives her a card with his number, telling her to call him if she needed any help. Juliet finds Shivette in the NA and watches their conversation.
Shivette, Andrew, and Juliet are having dinner and Andrew tells Juliet to apologize. She apologizes for the dress and tells her that she'll pay for it to be fixed. Shivette thanks her but tells her that she is worried about her, not the dress. Andrew says that he and Juliet have been talking and it was going to be different in the house. Juliet asks about Shivette's day and gives her hints about seeing her at the NA meeting. Andrew reminds Shivette about letting him handle it, not wanting to get matters out of hand. Then, Gemma walks in telling them she needs to talk to both of them, saying that what she's about to tell them is a "game changer". Instead of what Bridget expected her to say, Gemma reveals that she doesn't want to work on the loft anymore, saying that she's overwhelmed with everything that's going on. Andrew, then, excuses himself and Bridget thanks Gemma, but she says not to thank her yet. She has a favor to ask Bridget.
Gemma tells Bridget that she wants to divorce Henry but needs proof that she's cheating on him as there is an infidelity clause in their prenup. This causes Henry not to get any of her money or custody of the kids. She asks for Bridget to sleep with him, for her to catch him in the act. She threatens her that if she doesn't, she'll tell everyone who she really is.
She and Charlie meet up for coffee and he gives her advice on her problem, though she never tells him the exact details of it. She just tells him that if she goes through with it, she'll never be able to live with herself. He offers to be her sponsor, but she refuses, saying that she already has one.
Gemma quietly walks in on Henry talking on the phone. As he hangs up, she asks if something is wrong and he tells her that publishers are dropping him. Gemma is surprised that when he was talking about "defining himself", he was talking about his book, not about being a husband or a father.
Bridget and Gemma meet at the loft and she tells Gemma that she's not going with her proposal. Gemma reminds her that she doesn't have a choice. She has researched what Bridget has done in the past and warns her about what would happen if Andrew found out. She also threatens Bridget that she would tell Agent Machado. Bridget tells her that she's trying to fix Siobhan's mistakes. Gemma doesn't change her mind and tells her that she has until midnight to sleep with Henry.
Andrew breaks to Juliet that she's going to public school. He thinks that all of her friends who have been in and out of rehab 3 or 4 times before their 16th birthdays are bad influences on her. Juliet insists that it's Siobhan that's causing her to act out. She tells him that the reason why she hates Siobhan is because "she's a cheating bitch who sleeps with married men."
Shivette meets Henry at a bar and tells him that Gemma knows about the affair and the baby. She tells him of Gemma's plan to keep her money and the kids. She tries to get Henry to love Gemma again, but he tells her that he gives up.
Andrew reveals to Shivette that Juliet knows that he cheated on her mother by dating Siobhan. Even though the marriage was long over, he knew that they discarded Juliet. He's worried about her as she snuck out. Shivette suggests a place where Juliet may be and he heads to the place, while she stays at home. Shivette looks at her phone: 11:59pm.
Gemma walks into Andrew and Siobhan's place, looking for Andrew, but instead, she finds Bridget. She lets her know that her time is up. Bridget reminds her that she doesn't want anything to do with her husband and that she knows how Gemma feels. She says that she just wants a chance. Gemma admits that she doesn't know what she's doing.
Gemma is in a taxi when Henry calls her. He tells her that Shivette told him about her plan to have custody of the boys and is not letting her take them away from him.
Shivette and Andrew walk inside a club and find Juliet. Andrew tries to explain about what happened in his and her mother's marriage, but, Juliet keeps arguing that it's Siobhan's fault. Shivette explains that she never meant to break up Juliet's family, and that if hating her helps her cope, she should go for it, but she should stop hurting her father and herself. Juliet decides that she wants to go home. Andrew, then, gets an alarming call from Gemma asking him to go to her house as it is an emergency.
Shivette starts cleaning Siobhan's vandalized portrait. Juliet tells her that she's doing it wrong, and helps her clean it.
Andrew arrives at Gemma and Henry's house. Henry answers the door and reassures Andrew that everything is okay. He refuses to let him in as he has work to do. Henry closes the door and walks back to a messy apartment with a lamp on the floor and blood on the walls.
Character Appearances (in order of appearance)Edit
- This episode was once titled We Actually Used To Like Each Other before it was changed to the present one.
- Siobhan is close to two months in the pregnancy 
- Bridget has been posing as Siobhan for two weeks.
- The episode title is said by Juliet while she and Andrew were talking about Siobhan.
- This is the first episode that the real Siobhan never appeared in.
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